Queen Skittles of the 2009 Pasadena DooDah Parade

I’m not so good at it. My friend Vera rode her bike to my place, and I decided, after a few years, that I would rollerblade on our excursion to Coffee Bean. So we started off @ Kenwood & Doran…..

The wheels on my skates just don’t like to stop! But I was determined to keep going………We were at a stop light and I went down on one of those yellow bumpy areas without stepping over it and…… BAM!!!!!!! I fell right on my bottom in the street! So funny! I picked myself up, hoping that people were in their cars laughing at me, and we went to Michaels. In the store I put my hand on my head and MY CROWN WASN”T THERE! The look of shock on my face convinced Vera lightning fast that I would perish without it! So melodramatic. So she saved the day and went back to get it!

Vera Valentine saved my crown!

As we left the parking lot, I fell again. But this time I put my crown in my purse. Anyways, it was a lovely day and I was so glad to fall in front of my lovely citizens of Glendale!

Queen SKittles on my rollerblades @ California & Glendale

Vera & Me after our ride

Cheers,

Queen Skittles

Dear Friends,

After my roommate and I watched my recent purchase of The Bodyguard with Whitney Houston & Kevin Costner, we spontaneously decided to go to the strip club by San Fernando- Godfather-The Gentleman’s Club, “Fully Nude”. I planned to go to a strip club for the first time on my birthday (March 26th), but opted for the Red Lion instead. Wise choice! I love my German Pub

So we went on a Saturday night, which I would think is the best night to experience any club. We didn’t want to valet, but even then it was $3 to park on the dirt area next to the club. (For all who don’t know, this strip club is located by the train tracks next to the 5fwy & 134.) $20 to get in. That’s sort of reasonable for a Saturday night. (By the way, I’m typing this at 1am while I watch old episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on hulu.com while eating popcorn & drinking a cold vodka tonic.)

We enter through the red velvet draperies and a cute girl with a yellow thing on greeted us. I’m all nervous because I’ve never been to a strip club before, but she was super nice! I also, of course, wear a crown (a small one, it’s my “everyday crown) whereever I go, so she commented on it. I told her I’m Queen of a Parade. She laughed politely. We sat down (not at the stage). We watched at a table for awhile. Some of the girls were good. Some were AMAZING. One girl went allllllll the way up the pole to the top! I love appreciating a beautiful woman, just like most people. I’m not a lesbian but I am an artist and I like observing people. So that’s why I’m interested in strip clubs.

While we were there for a little less than 2 hours, we saw about 10-12 girls on stage. Now, I don’t really need to see everything, but it IS called a nude strip club. Only 2 got completely nude! If the girls aren’t going to be fully nude, that’s fine, just say it’s partial and serve alcohol! But I believe this club is into false advertisement. So not-so-fully-nude girls without alcohol. Very confusing. A couple of the women were “older” too…….probably 40′s. That was weird. Not that I don’t think women in their 30′s or 40′s are beautiful and sexy, but really……in a strip club?

There was a light crowd in the beginning and more guys came later. Of course they got creepier. There were a few non-creepy ones. All-in-all VERY good people watching! Not really my thing, however. Maybe once a year. Although I liked some of the girls, I was disappointed that I didn’t wait until Vegas to go to my first strip club. Ah, well. I’ll be in Vegas on May 21st!!!!!!!

I hope this was amusing to whoever reads this.

Cheers,

Queen Skittles